So I am happy to report that the Red Sox won tonight. Final score was 12-2. This means I can leave my apartment tomorrow and venture out into public. You don't understand, games when the Sox lose aren't so pretty in my world.
So thank you Red Sox, for allowing my weekend to continue normally. We got game seven tomorrow night, which should live up to all the hype. But tonight it was just a great game to watch. Manny and Big Papi had only one hit between the two of them, but we didn't need them tonight. Instead, all the short guys of the team stepped up (insert short person joke here) and carried the team. Let's hear it for short people, woooooo!
What is the big friggin deal with Fausto Carmona anyway? If any of you reading this are Cleveland Indians fans, please email me and let me in on the secret. All I hear about him is how he is this overpowering pitcher who throws, like, 118 mph fastballs and shoot lightning bolts out of his ass. Yeah, I guess I'm just not seeing what everyone else is seeing. Turns out he won 19 games during the regular season. Ooooooh, impressive.
What they don't tell you, is that he probably pitched against Tampa Bay and Kansas City in all but like, 3 of those games. That really is the only way he could have that many wins, the way this guy actually pitches.
The actual game after the third inning, surprisingly, was pretty calm. I would say boring, but any game where the Red Sox are winning by 9 or more runs never can be classified as boring for me.
I don't know if I was the only one who noticed, but I was quite amused with the tough guy act that Victor Martinez was putting on when he hit the only home run of the game for Cleveland. If you didn't happen to catch it, when he hit the home run, he took a really long time to go around the bases.
Usually when a batter does this, it pisses the pitcher off and is supposed to "show him up," so to speak. Like "you suck and I just homered off of you" type stuff. Martinez accomplished neither of these two things. Schilling didn't even seem to notice him. And Martinez just looked like a huge horses ass. A very slow moving horses ass, mind you.
Quick back story -- during game 5, in Cleveland, Manny Ramirez homered and took a little bit longer than "usual" to get around the bases. Cleveland cried about how Manny had disrespected their team for two days straight. I think Victor Martinez was trying to get some sort of payback.
Hey Victor, you fat walrus, get your tubby ass around those bases already. You're not cool like Manny, and your team is getting slaughtered. You're a real dick, you know that? Guess what, I know you were trying to be like Manny or whatever, but your lard ass actually took longer to get around then Manny did the other night.
And cmon, you gotta give Manny a break. The reason he took so long is that he was probably just hopped up on who knows what and didn't want to trip on his way around the bases. With you, taking your sweet little time just made you look fat, and ugly. Oh and you looked fat too.
Anyway here is a pic after like 14 seconds, and he's just now getting to first base. Hey "Lardass" Martinez, go to the gym you fatty. And stop trying to be a tough guy, it's just making you look really really bad. I am sure lots of people will remember how tough and scary you were, when they're watching the Sox and the Rockies in the World Series next week. And you'll be at home, sitting on your tubby hind end watching from your couch.
Well people, there will surely be more from me tomorrow.
