Well, uhh, it's not quite a jet plane. But it will have to do for tonight.
But in about two hours I will be boarding a plane similar to this, and flying around looking at stuff in the dark, from the air. It sounds pretty cool, and beats the hell out of sitting at home watching Dancing With The Stars. Quick question -- can you even consider it "boarding" when it's a plane this small? Umm, this is going to be interesting.
Anyways, since we all know that these plane rides don't always go "as planned", I just wanted to say a few words. So if you read this and no one knows where my will is, just direct them to my blog. They'll laugh, they'll cry and they'll also know who gets all my useless crap.
So here we go. I gotta do this quick. I have always believed it's not healthy to plan your death in too much detail.
- My Playstation 2 will go to Jim. It's very old, in horrible condition and Lord knows he doesn't need it, but I figure if anyone can sucker some poor 8 year old to fork over money for that thing, he can.
- My computer goes back to Best Buy, where I got it from. Ahh, the beauty of credit. I am sure they will want it back, since they still own the majority of it.
- My guitar goes to my dad. He truly can play the crap out of the guitar.
- Please will someone burn my Johnny Damon Boston Red Sox jersey? I've been meaning to do this for about two years now. You may video tape this burning and send it to Johnny if you want, too. He deserves to see this, after what a punk he's been.
- My copy of 300 goes to Chris Roberts. He's been dying to watch this for a long time. Enjoy it man, even if I'm not there.
- Take all of my clothes and distribute them among the homeless. Hey, they still may be homeless after getting my clothes, but they'll look pretty freakin sexy. And the world could definitely use some more sexy homeless people.
I'm running out of time here people. What's probably going to really end up happening is that all of my stuff will have to be sold off just to pay off my debt. So with that said, before they can get to it, all of you have my permission to steal as much of it as possible. Stickin' it to the man, even after I'm dead and gone. How cool is that?
Anyway, I am leaving now. Hopefully not this world. Hopefully just my apartment. But it's been great knowing all of you. And I wish I could have made out with more of you ladies. And if you ever get down and out, and you just need a lift, just remember my little motto for life: Everybody wang chung tonight.
So long amigos...
